In honor (and complete misunderstanding) of Palm Sunday, Barack Obama went in search of palm trees yesterday and ended up in the island paradise of Cuba. Assuming that your definition of “paradise” is “someplace you’ll be thrown in jail for life if you don’t say it’s paradise.”
In his never-ending quest to build a legacy, the president is normalizing relations with the oppressive communist dictatorship in hopes of increasing the number of investment opportunities for his wealthy donors, while decreasing the number of Cuban immigrants whose children might grow up to become conservative GOP presidential candidates.
While in Cuba, Mr. Obama will be staying at The Only Nice Hotel and have full use of The Only Running Car, and will attend a baseball game, give a speech to the locals, and no doubt visit one of Cuba’s famous cigar factories where tobacco leaves are hand-rolled on the supple thighs of local virgins.
He will also visit a fully-socialized Cuban hospital which specializes in the treatment of supple thigh cancer.